I remember how Sheri would always get me chocolates for Valentine's Day, white chocolate, my favorite. I have a picture somewhere of a bouquet she made me for Valentine's of chocolate in a basket with little heart balloons. I don't remember if I ever did anything for Valentine's Day for her or not, or her birthday or any anniversary. I really don't. That's how selfish and inconsiderate I was. She would do anything for me, loved, adored and worshiped me and showed it, I on the other hand thought my love for her was enough. And it was, for a long time, but only because I was so selfish. I watch these old clips of her and I think wow, am I insane. I should have kept stringing her along my path of self destruction. I just hope she is in a better place. I am worried sick about her financially. The power has been out and the hive is snowed in and closed so I know she is not working and she hasn't contact me. Not a good sign.
Got a Valentine's Day e-card from Lexis which was nice. I thought about sending Lexis flowers but decided against it. Lexis is going to move to Turkey and live with her so called ex-boyfriend for two months. I think she should go, could be a life changing experience for her and Bourn (however you spell and pronounce his name) sounds like a great guy. He's an engineer, has a good job, is thin and handsome, she looks very happy with him in the picture she sent me. So I don't think its going anywhere with Lexis or Barb or Allyson. Oh well, have to start looking again on PoF (Plenty of Fish) to find someone else.
I still talk to Sheri in my head and imagine how the conversation would go. Today I have been imagining discussing why she hasn't called or texted me yet. The wait is agonizing.
No comments:
Post a Comment