November 30th - GASS

Greed, arrogance, stupidity and selfishness did me in, GASS.  

I'm not sure how to get out of this rut I am in.  I feel like my only hope is to win Sheri back, as remote a dream as that is.  My plan was to win her back as her sugar daddy with all the money I would ever need at my disposal to woo her.  Well screwed up that plan and my life and her life royally.  I have condemned us to at best a middle class life that's for sure.  Oh well, I have to get over it and move on.  

Talked to Sheri three times this week, a record.  Told her what I want, I want her back, not sure what she wants from me and she doesn't know either.  

I hope this story ends on a happy note and doesn't take ten years...

The good thing in my life is Sheri is continuing to talk to me and will again.  I told her for right now I just want to be emotionally intimate friends but she is not ready even for that so I have to give her as much time as she needs to heal from all the damage I inflicted.  

I achieved the two main goals in my life, met the woman of my dreams who made my every fantasy come true and had more money than could spend in a lifetime, I had custody over 420 Bitcoins.  I had both of those dreams in my hand and I let them both go.  I did that.   I am responsible.  Now what?  Where do I go from here?  The only thing I can hope for in my life is to get Sheri back.  She doesn't want me back and is content with her life in Oregon.  She likes her job, her customers, her friends, her family, her Dad.  I feel like the only thing I can do is try to persuade Sheri I am sincere and I have changed mostly, somewhat.