Barb is here, she slept on the couch. I have to get up and go entertain her, she spent three hours yesterday to come see me, Sheri would spend nine hours to come see me and I would be drunk on purpose to get her to hate me, to test her love, to push her limits. Why oh why did I do it? Choices and decisions we make that affect our lives forever. Now I have lost Sheri completely, I am in the win her back phase. Dream on. Win back her friendship, that's what I want to do. Better go see Barb, its 8:22am on a Friday morning, not working until Monday thank goodness.
8:54am - Why did I do it? Why did I drink when Sheri came to see me and on her birthday? Because I knew I could get away with it. My parents would let me stay drunk for days when Sheri came to see me, they never would do that otherwise. I could go on a drunken binge and I would have been craving one by that time. I did it because I wanted Sheri to hate me, I wanted to drive her away. Why I just couldn't tell her I don't know, why I had to torture her with my love is beyond me.
What to do about Barb, I don't know.
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